Your face is like a car wreck, i cant look away

Sooooooooooooooo here i am ... eating lunch at work and blogging.. thats so sad. Well without a computer i have to go somewhere right? I think my mother board went bad or something but i still need to find the time to take it apart and see whats up. Oh, and my car broke last night.. the fan belt kinda fell apart, the air compressor stopped working and the water pump got really hot and i haven't checked it again today. So i guess i need to get a new bus pass right? Things around here have been changing rather quickly also. I'm now spending most my nights out with people doing random bad things thats i shouldn't do but it helps with all the other weird shit going on right now.. that made no sense.. well not sure where things are going now but some things havent changed, i still push people away, i guess im never good enough for anyone.. oh well time to find more sedatives and get back to work.

It was 100 degrees as we sat beneath a willow tree
Whose tears didn't care, they just hung in the air
And refused to fall, to fall
I knew I'd made a horrible call
And now the state line felt like the Berlin wall
And there was no doubt about which side I was on

Because I built you a home in my heart
With rotten wood that decayed from the start

Because you can't find nothing at all
If there was nothing there all along
No, you can't find nothing at all
If there was nothing there all along

I braved treacherous streets
And kids strung out on homemade speed
And we shared a bed in which I could not sleep
At all, woo hoo, woo hoo oo oo hoo
At night, the sun in retreat
Made the skyline look like crooked teeth
In the mouth of a man who was devouring us both
You're so cute when you're slurring your speech
But they're closing the bar and they want us to leave

And you can't find nothing at all
If there was nothing there all along
No, you can't find nothing at all
If there was nothing there all along

I'm a war of head versus heart
And it's always this way
My head is weak, my heart always speaks
Before I know what it will say

Because you can't find nothing at all
If there was nothing there all along
No, you can't find nothing at all
If there was nothing there all along
There were churches, theme parks and malls
There was nothing there all along

So a fresh begining

I said a while back that i was going to delete my blog and after the drama from last night i thought now was a good time. So to all parties involved im sorry about last night. It's just been a weird few weeks. I'm alone at home, and i have to think about how im such a failure all the time. I just wish someone could understand, u can say that u do but i know u dont. I really want my mind to be clear. I think i just need someone to talk to, a real friend who won't judge me? So this weekend #2 u need to clear your bloody schedule I DONT CARE THAT U HAVE TO STUDY BMS.. ok yeah i do care lol. Well this is a new beginning so lets see where this one goes..

When I was young I knew everything
And she a punk who rarely ever took advice
Now I'm gilt stricken,
Sobbing with my head on the floor
Stop a baby's breath and a shoe full of rice
I can't be held responsible
Cause she was touching her face
I won't be held responsible
She fell in love in the first place

For the life of me I cannot remember
What made us think that we were wise and
We'd never compromise
For the life of me I cannont believe
We'd ever die for these sins
We were merely freshmen

My best friend took a week's
Vacation to forget her
His girl took a weeks's worth of
Valium and slept
Now he's guilt stricken sobbing with his
Head on the floor
Thinks about her now and how he never really
Wept he says

We've tried to wash our hands of all this
We never talk of our lacking relationships
And how we're guilt stricken sobbing with our
Heads on the floor
We fell through the ice when we tried not to
Slip, we'd say